I can’t remember anymore when was the last time I cried hard until yesterday.
I missed the church service in the morning, yet I didn’t understand why my feet led me to go to another church to listen to God’s Word.
My entrance was the usual entry I do when I enter His dominion, but the moment was totally different. Perhaps, it could the people whom I was totally estranged since it is not my home church. Maybe, it’s the new environment where I chose to worship that day. Actually, the Lord made me realize that’s it’s neither the people nor the place that seemed different when He finally touched my heart like He always does.
The praise and worship was over, and the worship leader was already praying for the service when I uttered my sincerest prayer all these times. As I talk to the awesome God, tears started to flow down my eyes and I started to weep like a child. I had never cried in months, and I felt like I was being embraced by a thoughtful Father who misses His son so much. I cried because I am literally tired, and I needed that moment with Him.
When I got home, I thought that was it. After I did my tasks, I started reading the book that I purchased since I was in college. I never opened that book. Actually, it was still covered with plastic as if it was recently bought. I did not attempt to read the book because I have never possessed the courage to know what God wants me to realize all these years. As I flipped the pages, it shocked me how the love of Christ matters to me. Line by line, my heart pounded with excruciating pain yet the Lord finally healed me with all the things that I have been sheltering in my heart all these years. I can’t imagine a life without Jesus, and for two hour and more, I kept on reading, listening, praying, and crying out to my one and only God.
And my life would never ever be the same. His grace quenched the thirst that I have been experiencing recently. I’m glad that Jesus loves me.